There are times I look back at the wreckage of my past and wonder how I made it through. I lost nearly every friend I had. Three failed marriages. Two grown children who may never fully understand how deeply trapped I was inside my own mind.
Through all of it, one soul stood by my side.
Kayla.
In the dedication of Nobody’s Words, I wrote that my love for her is as essential to me as breath is to life. That wasn’t an exaggeration. It was the simplest, truest thing I’ve ever said.
When I was lost in the throes of mental illness, I couldn’t see the world around me. I didn’t recognize how people were running out of options to reach me. I didn’t see how busy they were with their own lives, their own battles, while I flailed through my days without comprehension.
I didn’t see the broken promises, the words spoken in a fog of confusion, the heaviness I unknowingly placed on the people around me. I didn’t even realize I was incapable of caring for myself.
But Kayla saw something in me I had never seen in myself.
She saw light where I thought there was only darkness. She stayed through the worst of it—through the suicide attempts, the hospital stays, the moments when I tore apart every false reality I had been living in. She was there through the tears, the fears, the madness.
And she never left.
Our life together reads like a fairytale, except I wasn’t the knight in shining armor—I was the dimwit in distress, locked in a tower of my own making. And she rescued me.
I wouldn’t be here if not for her patience, her tolerance, her unwavering love.
Because of her, I see my life clearly now. Because of her, I get to be the father I couldn’t be for my first two children. I get to be the person I failed to be for my friends, my family, myself.
Every blessing, every beautiful moment I create today is because of her love.
She is the strongest, most influential person I have ever known. She inspires me daily, makes me dream of the future—something I never used to do.
She is my everything.
My beautiful eternity.